Essay – examples & model answers | C1 Advanced (CAE)
CAE Essay Example & Model Answer: Younger people
Example exam task:.
Write an essay discussing only two points . You should explain which point is more important , giving reasons in support of your answer.
CAE Essay: Example Answer (Grade: 3-4)
Example answer:.
Adults can influence younger people in a good way, but also in a bad way. There are various possibilities how this can happen.
On the one hand, setting a good example is a quite useful way, because younger people will be able to see the adult’s behaviours and ways of thinking. They will see and feel the adult’s values and lives and may decide to become like them someday or at least to try to behave and think like adults.
On the other hand, offering advices seems to be the better way for me, how adults can influence younger people. Because, setting a good example to follow can be useful, but it also is pretty exhausting for adults and they may have some pressure as well. In addition, it’s just an opportunity for younger people, because they’ll decide rather they want to become like these adults or not.
In my opinion, younger people should try to learn how life works on their own. This will lead to more failures, but in my opinion, failing is normal and necessary. Of course this way of influencing is more exhausting for younger people, but I guess they’ll figure out how to do things on their own.
Failures are crucial for learning and for success, therefore I think that adults just should offer advices and show them, that they believe in them. That’s going to encourage younger people and they will try to learn and believe in themselves. That’s why I think, that offering advices is the better way how adults can influence younger people.
FCE, CAE, CPE
Practice, write & improve, examiners comments & grade:, cae essay: model answer (grade: 4-5).
Many parents, struggle with bringing up their child into be responsible adults and are unsure how to influence them. There are of course, many ways of influencing young adults, and I want to present and discuss two of them: giving rules to obey and offering your children advice.
First of all, it has to be said that advice is easy to ignore, and that children especially in their adolescent years, don’t even want advice, and will tell you so, too: ‘I don’t need your help’, they will say to you or even shout at you. Kids often feel misunderstood they think their parents can’t understand them, because they are ‘too old’. If your son or daughter has a problem, it is important to make him or her feel that you do understand and only want their best and are, therefore, offering some advice, hoping it will help them.
Then again, there are rules. Rules can be placed differently, they don’t need to be a stone-hard barrier to your child’s freedom. Adolescents will often bend rules or utterly break them all because they need this certain feeling of rebellion and freedom. Rules also help the maturing of the conscience. If a child doesn’t need to follow rules, it’s conscience will never mature and it will not know wrong from right. If, however you place rules, and punishments should they not be followed, your son or daughter will learn not to steal, to be home on time simply because he or she doesn’t want to be punished. Don’t overdo it, though. Placing too hard punishments could also lead to destruction of the conscience your child never being able to make it’s own decisions.
I think that giving rules to obey is the best way of influencing young people. Wherever you go, you find certain rules. Not every rule is absolutely sensible, but while growing older, your child will learn by itself which rules should be followed and will follow them of free choice.
CAE Essay Model Answer: Crimes
The documentary investigated what makes young people commit crimes. It seems to me that the most important reason is lack of appropriate control by parents.
To put the blame for youth crime on parents may seem rather unfair, but a lot of the interviews and information in the documentary backed up this belief. There is more than one reason why many parents fail to control their children. Some parents believe that it is wrong to discipline children in any way, and think that children should be free to do whatever they want. Some parents are simply too lazy and selfish to control their children, preferring to let them behave badly so that they can continue doing what they want. Another reason is that some parents did not grow up being disciplined by their parents and so they do not do that with their own children.
Factors such as economic position and influence from peers can of course play a major role in causing young people to turn to crime. However, it is my view that how children am brought up is more important than either of those. They need firm rules to be given to them by parents who they respect, and if they are not given firm guidance by parents, some of them are bound to behave badly. Some of this bad behaviour will be criminal. If you do something wrong and you get away with it, you will do it again or do worse things.
CAE Essay Model Answer: Talent Shows
The discussion focused on various issues connected with TV shows that feature members of the public. They have been a worldwide phenomenon for some time and views on them vary greatly.
One of the main aspects of these shows is the entertainment they provide for viewers. Obviously, they would not be watched by so many people if audiences didn’t find them entertaining. During the discussion. It was said that the shows are enjoyable to watch and do no harm. People enjoy watching ordinary members of the public living their lives, doing their jobs or taking part In talent competitions because they can relate to those people. I think that this 15 true. Although I don’t personally find them interesting and therefore seldom watch them, I agree that many people find them very entertaining.
However, a morn serious aspect was discussed and that Is the Influence these shows can have on people. especially young people. This, I think, Is the most Important aspect. Many young people are Influenced by these shows and the people on then They too want to appear on TV, to be ‘famousjust like the people they see. Rather than thinking realistically about their futures and about getting jobs and careers. they get the Impression that anyone can be famous. Instead of focusing on building a life in a practical way, they dream of being like those people on the shows. I think this 15 the most important consequence of these shows and It is a harmful one.
CAE Essay Example & Model Answer: Facilities
Facilities in need of funds
Having listened to today’s radio programme about facilities that need financial help, I realised that sports centers and public gardens have been neglected over the years by the local authorities.
There are few sports centers out there that meet the right characteristics that a good sports center must have. This is one of the many reasons that people avoid sport. We see lots of kids nowadays suffering from obesity and other health problems caused by the simple fact that they don’t do sport.
Another reason for this is that people have nowhere to go out for a walk or to run in a nice place. Public gardens, parks for example are also lacking in numbers. The ones that are already there are not very nice and they don’t look very good. I think that by improving this two facilities the population can benefit from this. By creating more sports centers, there will be some more jobs offered, and some kids might even follow a sports career. By making more public gardens people can get out more often and spend some good quality time relaxing.
I think that local authorities should invest money in both facilities because, this is a good way to increase the populations health.
Example Answer:
In regard of a recent discussion about the facilities, which are financially supported by local authorities, I would like to write a few of my personal thoughts. Whether we are talking about sports centres or public gardens, there is no doubt that they are both a good thing to have in the city and should both be supported somehow. The only question then is which one of these is more important, what are the pros and cons of each one?
Let me start with the sport centres as I think these are a bit more problematic. Obviously, in our times where lots of people spend days sitting in their office staring at a computer, some sort of physical training is very important. We have to balance that shift in our lifestyles. The problem I see with supporting the sports centres is the number of activities that you can do at these days. There is almost countless list of either individual or team sports that we can think of, and each centre is usually designed for a specific type or at least a group of sports similar in its nature. Therefore I think that it is too difficult to support them equally and we can’t say which activity is better than the others either. Another reason for not financing sports as much as green parks is their commercial use. What I mean by that is that we usually pay for everything the centre offers us to do and therefore they are more able to last from their own money than gardens.
Regarding of the green spaces, the situation is much clearer I think. Every city needs gardens where people can sit and relax, but nobody is going to pay a tax for just walking around.
These factors lead me to my conclusion, that the public gardens are definitely a facility which should be financed from public money, whereas in the case of sports centres, the situation is questionable.
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CAE Essay Examples | 1 Great Way To Learn
Table of Contents
CAE Essay Examples Introduction
Before looking at some CAE essay examples, we should quickly answer this question: "What is a CAE essay?"
A CAE essay is an obligatory task in the C1 Advanced (CAE) Cambridge English exam. There are 4 CAE exam papers: Speaking, Listening, Reading & Use of English and Writing. The CAE essay forms part 1 of the 2 part writing paper. Students need to answer a question and write between 220-260 words.
On the rest of this page I have put some CAE essay examples which my students have sent to me. If you keep reading, you will find tasks to complete and either a video or written feedback which I provided to the student. The feedback is based on the Cambridge English Assessment Scale from the C1 Advanced handbook for teachers. It is very important to understand this marking criteria if you want to pass this part of the exam.
If you don't know how to write a good essay, or if you want to know how examiners mark your essay, check out my C1 Advanced Essay page.
CAE Essay Example 1 - Question, Critique etc.
Cae essay question.
WAYS OF LOOKING AFTER YOUNG CHILDREN:
At home with parents or other family members In nurseries or pre-school With a professional nanny
Write an essay for your tutor in 220-260 words. You should discuss two of the ways of looking after young children in your notes. You should explain which way is more beneficial and provide reasons to support your opinion.
CAE Examiners Assessment Template
Download this assessment template here or complete the online version here with your thoughts on the writing below.
CAE Essay Example 1 - Answer
C1 Essay Example Answer & My Comments
I have highlighted the mistakes and written comments showing you how to correct them in ( bold and italics).
HOW TO LOOK AFTER YOUNG CHILDREN
There is no doubt that one of the problems of (the word ‘problem’ collocates with ‘with’ before a person/people) modern families is how to take care of young children. Some years ago, the most common solution was to leave the new-borns with a family member. Usually, it was the mother, who had to leave her job and sacrifice her career for the new arrival. Today, the situation is slightly different, because, often, both parents have to work and no relatives are available to come into (‘into’ is not the right word to use here - you could say - ‘come and support’) support of (don’t write ‘of’ here. We say ‘support somebody’ in English, not ‘support of somebody’) the family. In this essay, I will discuss two possible solutions (‘solution’ is not the right word here. ‘Solution’ implies that leaving the children with a family member is not an option, and that you will therefore discuss two alternative methods. The problem is the next paragraph then talks about leaving the children with a family member) and their advantages and disadvantages.
One of the advantages of leaving your children with a family member is that you trust this person (I would say ‘this person will usually have your trust’ - because it is better to try and use the passive voice in an essay. We also tend to use more nouns and fewer verbs in formal writing) and you know (do you know that?) that they will certainly take care of them in the best way. Furthermore, when the children are sick, you can leave them in bed and check their temperature frequently, preventing complications. (I think you could develop this last sentence more and state that you cannot do this if the children go to nursery) . On the other hand, though, your children could (you should use ‘may’ or ‘might’ rather than ‘could’ here. ‘Could not’ in this sentence means they were not able to. It is a definitive statement and it does not imply possibility) not develop some important social skills such as team playing (‘teamwork’ might be a better word to use here) and sharing (‘connecting’ might be a better word to use. We tend to say ‘sharing’ + something) with peers, but they could be left (for) some time in front of a screen (you could explain why this wouldn’t be beneficial) .
Another solution could be to make them attend a nursery. There are numerous advantages in (‘advantages’ collocates with ‘to’) this approach as well, but, above all, I would enlighten (‘enlighten’ is usually followed by an object) that children are taught to stay together, to help each other and to have fun. Unfortunately, on the other hand, they run the risk of getting ill more frequently and this could be a problem for parents who have to take maternity leave to cure (‘look after’ or ‘take care of’ are better phrases to use here. ‘Cure’ is stronger and implies the parents will heal them from a serious illness or disease) them.
To sum up (this expression is a little too informal for an essay) , I think that I would choose a mixed solution for my children: a family member during the first years but then a nursery as soon as they start speaking and relating (‘building relationships’) with others, so that to (remove the word 'to' and replace it with 'they') improve their abilities (‘ability’ should be countable singular here) to be part of a group.
CAE Essay Sample Marks
Cae essay sample - pass or fail.
Adding the marks together, the student has scored:
Content: 3/5
Communicative Achievement: 3/5
Organisation: 4/5
Language: 2/5
Total: 12/20.
If you can't remember what these scores mean, watch my CAE writing marking criteria video .
If this student got 12/20 for their part 2 writing in the exam, they would have 24/40 for the C1 Advanced writing paper.
The student would therefore pass this exam paper.
To understand how these marks are calculated, check out this page . I suggest using a table like this to mark your scores when you are practising for all the different exam papers.
CAE Essay Examples - Question 2 Critique etc.
This question has come from ' Cambridge English Advanced Practice Tests - Plus 2 ' by Nick Kenny and Jacky Newbrook.
While you read this example answer, you should write down any mistakes you find on this document , then complete the examiner assessment template below:
Online template
Hard copy Assessment Scale Template
Example Answer Download
C1 Writing Exam Assessment Template
If you haven't done it yet, download this assessment template here , or complete it online here with your thoughts on the writing above.
C1 Essay Sample Answer 2 & My Comments
Here is the student's answer with my corrections and comments written in ( bold and italics).
Nowadays , many young people tend to ask themselves how valuable is the benefit of taking part in sport competitions in which they participate ( I don’t think these words add any extra to the sentence) . It is said that ‘ it’ ( after using the phrase ‘it is said/thought that’ you should repeat the subject) is worth y (you should use ‘worth’ here) for healthy people to hav ing a positive attitude and th is (the attitude) are also usually able to contribute s more to a the healthy mind.
But which point s can be highlighted as valuable from ‘ having’ healthy lifestyles? (Personally, I wouldn’t ask questions in an essay). Not only ‘ does’ physical condition ha ve a very important role to play, but also mental condition might be affected ‘ as a result’ . This (what starts at the beginning?) starts at the beginning (the beginning of what?) when the young child can learn about the value of exercise. Despite having a fit ness body, this (what is ‘this’?) should not only be aimed at sport s competition s . They need to have continuous ‘win nings and los ses ings ’ in order to understand the importance of being trained mentally ( I think the argument of the essay disappears a bit here). For instance, Usain Bolt is an excellent athlete thanks to ‘ his’ capability to accept to los s e s and train hard for the next sport competition.
Attitude alone, however, is not enough. Young athletes need to have easy access to resources which will enable them to learn in a better way. There is no point in having a great attitude to learn if they cannot find materials that other athletes can share as tips in order to make the difference. In this case, these materials refer s to personal experiences and train ing methods ed abilities which youngsters need to pay more attention ‘to’ . If cooperation is not performed (we don’t normally ‘perform cooperation’, it would be more common to say ‘if cooperation does not exist’ , young people are all too likely to slip into bad habits (this paragraph is well written) .
To sum up, of the two values outlined above, healthy lifestyles is the more effective one. lt is more far reaching in that it relates to all aspects of living healthily. In addition to this, after all, through (‘developing the right’) attitude , that a person will learn why it is better to go to a sport competition than to lie on a couch in front of the television. (I don’t think I understand this final sentence. Do you mean attitude will teach a person? I probably wouldn’t introduce a new idea into the final sentence of an essay).
CAE Essay Sample 2 Marks
Below, you can read my critique on the examiner assessment scale...
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CAE Essay Sample 2 - Pass or Fail
This student has scored:
Communicative Achievement: 2/5
Organisation: 3/5
Language: 3/5
Total: 11/20.
If this student got 11/20 for their part 2 writing in the exam, they would score 22 out of 40 and they would not pass the CAE writing exam at a C1 level.
The student might still pass the exam if he/she gets higher marks in the other exam papers, Reading , Use of English , Speaking and Listening .
CAE Essay Examples - Question 3
Let's have a look at another example essay that a student sent to me. Similar to the first two, we'll have a look at the question, answer and my feedback.
Fantastic work if you've made it this far...you're really going to be helping yourself prepare for this tricky part of the exam. High five!
The following question can be found on this website .
While reading the next answer, you should complete the assessment scale. You can download the assessment template here or complete this online version .
CAE Essay Examples - Answer 3
CAE Essay Examples - Answer 3 pdf
Okay, so hopefully you've completed the hard copy or the online examiner assessment template with your marks and comments. Before reading my corrections below, you should now write down any mistakes you find on this document.
CAE Essay Examples - Answer 3 + My Comments
We live in a wor ’l’ d where there are so many options for travelling (Spelling mistakes are not a huge issue, but they are important if they disrupt the flow/meaning of your writing. This spelling mistake is in the first sentence and therefore might put negative thinking in the examiner’s mind) . According to a recent article, there has been an increase in international travelling. Since the article did not find the major causes of what is causing this new trend (can you think of a way to avoid saying ‘causes’ and ‘causing’ in the same sentence?) , I decided to raise two crucially important factors which could presumably contribute to this.
It cannot be denied that we take most means of transport for granted and flying on a plane is becoming more prevalent (Good sentence) . In comparison to the previous century, the cost of airline tickets has noticeably decreased. In other words, most airlines are now aiming at a wide ’r’ range of ‘people’ public . (We don’t often say ‘a range of public.’) Not only do they want to attract the affluent, but they also want to ensure that even the poorest citizens can afford to buy a ticket. Moreover, the convenience of aircraft also plays a vital role as flying is not so time-consuming. (Good paragraph).
Another potential factor is global business and trade. The majority of successful companies, such as Foxconn and Apple, are spread out into ‘across’ the whole world. If they did not do this, they would not be able to satisfy their customers. Therefore, they often have no other option, but to dispatch (‘dispatch’ is not often a word used for people but more for inanimate objects) their representatives , (remember the comma as this is a non-definite relative clause because the next part of the sentence is extra information) who always travel by plane. Secondly, the world economy has reached its peak, that is to say, our population is buying more cars. (I think this point would be made stronger by adding another sentence.)
To sum up, as far as I am concerned, global business plays a bigger role when it comes to the increase in travelling. Despite the fact that means of transport have changed, companies have a major impact. To make it clear, companies have the power to shape our society. We are under the influence of them. They set down the rules in terms of new trends in our society (I think you could combine the final two sentences and avoid repeating the words ‘our society’) .
CAE Essay Examples - Question 3 Marks
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CAE Essay Examples - Question 3 - Pass or Fail
I have awarded the essay the following marks:
Content - 3 Communicative Achievement - 4 Organisation - 4 Language - 4
Total: 15/20
In my opinion, this is a good essay. Remember you only have 90 minutes to complete 2 writing tasks in the exam, but if you could write this and a similar part 2 answer in 35 minutes each, leaving time for planning and checking, I think you will stand a good chance of passing at a C1 level. The examiners tend to mark the writing paper quite strictly in my experience and so it’s possible that some of the marking criteria could be awarded a 3, but it’s also possible some could be awarded a 5. It depends a little bit on the individual examiner. Well done!
CAE Essay Examples - Question 4
This came from the book ' Cambridge English Advanced 2 ' which you can buy here >>
CAE Essay Answer
You should print off a copy of the answer below here and write down any mistakes you find.
Alternatively, you can write the mistakes on a separate sheet of paper or on this online template .
You should also complete the examiner assessment scale template in hardcopy or online .
CAE Essay Answer With My Corrections
Here is a video of me critiquing this answer:
If you would like to receive a similar video critiquing one of your answers, check out my CAE writing assessment service >>
Below, you can read the answer with my corrections and what I wrote on the examiner assessment scale...
Social trends are part of today’s society and they could be described as peculiar behaviours that become ‘a’ fundamental characteristic of a society. In the last few years there have been many changes such as the development of ‘the’ internet, mobile phones and cheaper flights that have had an important influence in ‘on’ social trends.
As far as I’m concerned, the factor which influence ‘s’ the most social trends ‘the most’ is the communication and especially the new communication via social network ‘s’ . As a matter of fact s , the way we communicate has been influenced a lot by the development of ‘the’ internet and technology. Therefore, internationally widespread social networks such as Twitter, Instagram and TikTok have created ways of communicating that make it very easy to spread a peculiar ‘specific’ social trend by imitat ‘ing’ e the trends of other countries.
Other people may say that advertising is shaping social trends because of its u ‘i’ nescapable influence on consumers. Although it surely plays an important role and everywhere we go we are surrounded by advertising, in my humble opinion , we are totally used to them and we know how to ignore them, so they don’t ‘ do not’ have such a big influence on social trends.
In conclusion , it ’s ‘i s evident that what influence ‘s’ ‘social trends’ the most social trends are the ways of communicating used by the people of today. They have the ‘ability’ peculiarity to make the world smaller and spread a new trend amazingly rapidly with the feature that it will affect a big amount ‘number’ of people in a small amount of time.
CAE Essay Marks
C1 advanced writing - pass or fail.
Content - 3
Communicative Achievement - 3
Organisation - 4
Language - 2
Total: 12/20
You need a minimum of 24 out of 40 possible marks to pass the CAE writing paper. Remember, there are 2 different writings to complete, so you need to average 12 out of 20 for each writing task.
Remember, you do not need to pass every exam paper in order to pass the C1 Advanced (CAE) exam and get a certificate.
If you want to find out more about what marks you need in order to pass the exam, have a look at this page >>
More CAE Essay Examples + Feedback
I recently published a book with 6 CAE essay examples and 15 other CAE sample writings. They all have my mistakes and suggestions highlighted, as well as critique based on official writing marking criteria.
Some of you can read it for free with Kindle Unlimited:
Take a look inside >>
Register to start the course below >>
2 thoughts on “ CAE Essay Examples | 1 Great Way To Learn ”
I learnt a lot from your essays samples and corrections. Please send more of your lesson I need it for studies. Thanks
Thank you Evelyn, I’m glad they helped you. When you become a member of my website you get access to more of my materials: https://studentlanguages.com/membership-checkout/?level=4
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